A Hundred Year's Inheritance (Abridged) Episode 16

Going by the preview at the end of Episode 15, this episode may contain the mother of all catfights. Oh please don't disappoint me, Show. Please.

After Chae Won and Chul Goo argue a bit in the car, she attempts to at least do one sensible thing and call the cops on her cell phone. Chul Goo grabs the phone and tosses it out his window. Oh no, her Almighty (Not) Hello Kitty keyring was on that phone! Now who will save her?

Joo Ri is out shopping with her mother when they run into Se Yoon's clingy mother. EMIL assumes her "I'm so humble and soft spoken" guise as Joo Ri introduces the two women. They all go out for a spot of tea. EMIL gets to unroll her spiel of having been a young widow having to work hard to support her children. I'm not sure your crocodile tears are helping your daughter's case, EMIL. Clingy Mom mentions Se Yoon's name, the first time EMIL has heard the name of the guy her daughter is stalking. EMIL feels like she's heard the name before but hasn't yet connected it to the guy she tried to frame up.

Chae Won continues to try and get her ex-husband to stop the car but he's got this crazy look in his eyes. When she threatens to jump out of the car, Chul Goo replies he'll jump out as well.

Night falls and finally Chul Goo stops the car. They've arrived up in the mountains at a vacant villa he's borrowing from a friend. He keeps saying he wants to start over and get back together with her, paying no attention to all the times Chae Won has said:

The villa is dark and empty, the background music is creepy and Chul Goo still has that "I'm not all here" look in his eyes. And isn't that the same ugly statue from the Lair of the Evil Mother-In-Law? Chul Goo gets a knife. Ahhhh! And then he starts chopping onions and fixing dinner. Ahhhh!  And then he cuts his finger and there's blood everywhere. Ahhhh! 

Chae Won tries to speak calmly with her crazy kidnapper, telling him her father is probably worried about where she is. Chul Goo takes her over to the landline and tells her to call her dad and give him a story about not being able to come home tonight because of work or something. Stupid Girl does just as her kidnapper instructs her to. She doesn't even try to use a code with Dad. C'mon, girl, at least try something!

Too late. Chul Goo has a pair of scissors now and as soon as Chae Won is done talking he cuts the phone cord. He is seriously creeping me out now. Good job, Show! 

Chul Goo makes a clumsy pass at Chae Won. She pushes him away and slaps him saying she has no interest in getting back together with such a moma's boy. Um, when someone has that off-the-deep-end look in their eyes, I don't think this is the right approach, Chae Won. But then you are Stupid Girl.

Stupid Girl/Stupid Girl

Trapped with a nutcase/Stupid Girl

Will he kill her with that knife?

Or will she become his wife?

Who knows?

She's such a Stupid Girl

They get back into the car. She thinks he's finally come to his senses (although his eyes clearly say not) and is taking her back to town. He recommends she get some rest, he'll wake her up when they get to their destination. And Stupid Girl does! I'm about ready to have you sliced and diced at this point, Chae Won. 

When she wakes it is to find they're parked next to the ocean and Chul Goo is just staring at her with those crazed eyes. He puts the car in gear and drives recklessly along the seawall, screeching to a halt at the very edge where the concrete ends and the rocks begin. Revving the engine he once again asks Chae Won if she'll get back together with him. If not, then he'd rather they end this all here and now. Get out of the damn car, woman! 

But wait, Stupid Girl calls Crazy Man's bluff! She tells him she'd rather die than get back with him so go ahead, drive them off onto the rocks, go ahead! Crazy Man puts the car in gear and then... he chickens out. Instead he jumps out of the car and goes to scream at the ocean. (DramaKoreans just love screaming at the ocean.) 

Chae Won runs after him and tries to pull him back from the edge. He struggles to get away from her and they both end up falling over and tumbling down the rocks. 

They both get amnesia!

No, they don't, but wouldn't that have been something if they had? I wonder if there is a Kdrama with double amnesia in it?

Chae Won is knocked out so its up to Chul Goo to get her back up to the vacant villa in the mountains instead of taking her directly to the nearest hospital. And did I mention he did all this with an injured leg?

It is a new day and EMIL is worried about where her son has disappeared to. She fears he may be with Chae Won. Se Yoon is also wondering why he hasn't heard back from Chae Won as he's been leaving her messages about having her resume papers. Joo Ri comes into his office to give him a report and notices Se Yoon seems deep in thought. She asks what is troubling him. Se Yoon again gives her the brush off as he jumps into action to find the missing Chae Won. Joo Ri continues to not get the hint.

Se Yoon's first stop is the seafood department where Chae Won works. He talks to her co-workers and learns she didn't show up for work today. Oh yeah, and yesterday some man came in and dragged her out of the store but we never thought of calling the police or anything. Thanks alot, co-workers without a clue.

Meanwhile, EMIL shows up at the noodle factory looking for Chae Won. Her aunts, knowing all about EMIL and her evil deeds, band together to face the Wicked Witch of South Korea. EMIL is a formidable opponent so three against one is actually quite fair. Make that four against one as here comes Grandma to dump a bag of flour over EMIL's head! [Glee! Glee! Glee!] Grandma grabs EMIL by the hair but EMIL is able to push the old woman to the ground. Oh, it is on now!  Two of the aunts attack from both sides. Once again EMIL is strong enough to throw them off. I told you she's a formidable opponent.

As she's getting away from the Avenging Aunts, EMIL runs into Se Yoon who has arrived at the noodle factory. EMIL being EMIL she tells Se Yoon that Chae Won isn't here and Chul Goo hasn't been seen since yesterday so they must be together. Speaking of Chul Goo, he calls his mommy right at that moment to get help because Chae Won isn't waking up. 

Since EMIL is covered in flour she can't possibly go up to the villa so she sends Se Yoon instead. Chae Won wakes up to Se Yoon calling her name and thank goodness no, she doesn't have amnesia. Se Yoon picks her up to take her to the hospital. Chul Goo objects and demands Se Yoon put down his woman right now. Se Yoon coolly and confidently replies, "She's not your woman anymore."

Catfights and creepfests - I'm in Kdrama heaven!!

A Hundred Year's Inheritance (Abridged) Episode 15

I've been distracted by my new TV.

Se Yoon is shocked to see Chae Won working as a lowly peon in the seafood department. 

EMIL drops by Chul Goo's office to bring him some pictures of potential (rich) mates. While there she learns her son is calling a press conference to announce their company is donating $5 million dollars to charity. He claims it is to give the company a better image to the public but it's really to get back at Mom for breaking up his marriage. EMIL bursts into the conference room and puts the brakes on the press conference. Hell no they ain't giving away anything!

As his own Almighty (Not) Hello Kitty looks on, Se Yoon waits in his car outside the store for when Chae Won gets off work. He's momentarily interrupted by his own personal stalker, Joo Ri. He quickly gives her the brush off so he can get back to his own stalking. Driving his car slowly behind her, Se Yoon follows Chae Won to her bus stop. Because this is a Kdrama, this means Chae Won never ever hears or sees the car that's just a few feet behind her. Se Yoon simply sits in his car and watches her as the show's theme song plays for the billionth time. And now Se Yoon is stalking the bus she's riding on. 

He follows her to her drop off point and Se Yoon gets out of his car to finally go talk to her. But Chae Won's dad has come to the bus stop to pick his daughter up. Thwarted! Se Yoon gets to witness a father/daughter scene that is so sweet you'll get diabetes. 

Se Yoon returns home to find stalker Joo Ri is there waiting for him. OMG, woman, give him some breathing room! His facial expression obviously says Do Not Want.

Se Yoon at least quickly comes to the point. Yeah, he said whenever he starts dating again, Joo Ri would be first in line. But he's not at that point yet. Her being at his house is creeping him out, so back off.

Chul Goo hits the karaoke bars with three bimbos. His good time is interfered with by his own stalker - Mom. This entire episode is going to be about stalking! Anyway, EMIL is wanting her Pwecious Baby to come home and get ready for a date with a rich gal. Chul Goo does return home - with the three bimbos in tow. He presents the working girls as candidates for his next wife. EMIL puts the "throw" in throw pillows and beats the girls out of the house.

Se Yoon pretends to just run into Chae Won at her workplace. Chae Won pretends she's just here to do some shopping. They both pretend to have a cup of tea together. Because she's too proud to admit she's divorced and penniless, Chae Won talks about her husband and emigrating. Se Yoon goes along with her lie. She rudely keeps looking at her watch because she's got a job interview. She's in such a rush to leave him that she leaves her resume behind. Se Yoon takes it and tries to catch up to her but Chae Won has already caught a cab and of course she left her phone back at her workplace. What to do?

Chul Goo has discovered where his ex-wife is working. He arrives at the seafood department just as Chae Won is being chewed out by an EMIL clone. At least he yells at and pushes the screeching woman aside. But then he grabs Chae Won's hand and drags her out behind him. He throws Chae Won into his car and drives off with her. (She doesn't do anything to stop him from abducting her. You had plenty of time to open the car door and get back out, girlfriend. I understand, though. The Writers wouldn't let you get out of the car.)

Spiral Episode 2

I'm cooking dinner as I'm watching this so you'd better not be gross, Show.

For the long-running mystery (concerning the brutal murder of Elina), Prosecutor Pierre Clement confronts his friend Benoit. Yes, he knew the dead girl. He loved her. She had been at his house earlier the night she died but he claims not to know anything about the crime itself. His weak alibi is that he went to a casino and lost a lot of money.

For the secondary mystery, Clement arrives at a bloody crime scene. A black woman in handcuffs sits outside in the hallway while inside Coke Cop tries to calm a crying white woman. The victim, stabbed to death, is a small infant. Captain Laure Berthaud fills the prosecutor in on what they know. The woman in handcuffs is the baby's nanny. The crying woman is the neighbor who had called the police. The mother is away working as a checkout girl at a grocery store. (I'm sorry but there's no way in hell a checkout clerk can afford a nanny. I don't care what country you live in - no way.)

Back at his office, and with the help of a translator, Clement talks with a deaf old man. The conversation has something to do with key rings. Apparently this is a third case that has nothing to do with anything.

Coke Cop has found Ghislaine Androux, the mother of the baby. She's a former junkie back in rehab, this time for alcohol abuse. Berthaud is the one who has to break the bad news to Androux.

Coke Cop then meets with his informant/hooker girlfriend/dealer about the Elina case. She's not heard anything on The Street. 

On the advice of Clement, Benoit goes to tell his tale to Judge Roban. He explains Elina was a  professional escort (aka high price hooker) on the side. The Judge shows Benoit a list of names taken out of the diary. Does he recognize any of them? Benoit nervously laughs and says of course he recognizes the names. Everyone would. They're very prominent and powerful names.

Clement's estranged wife, Marianne, stops by his roomy apartment to bring him a painting. They seem to get along well, so why are they living apart?

Berthaud's other cop, Fromentin, has been keeping tabs on a ring of deaf keyring peddlers. Berthaud, with the translator from the earlier scene, come out to join Fromentin where they can see the deaf peddlers giving their profits to a Fagin type guy. The translator is acting odd. Berthaud calls for a swarm of backup and they storm the rundown building where Fagin and his deaf gang live. Everyone is arrested. Is selling keyrings that much of a crime in France?

Meanwhile, back at Clement's apartment, he just got some from Marianne. Benoit stops by to tell Clement how the talk with the judge went. He's worried about the diary and all the names in it. Benoit helped introduce Elina to some of her important clients and he worries that if these men are called in to be questioned it will go bad for him. He tries to talk Clement into "borrowing" the diary long enough to see just what and who is in it. Clement refuses. Benoit warns that Marianne's father's name may be in the diary. 

Hello? What about the dead baby? Are we ever going to get back to that?

Karlsson meets with her prospective new employer, the crazy lawyer guy who lives way in the back of the office. Crazy Lawyer has been disbarred and can't legally practice but can't give up the law. It's in his blood! He wants Karlsson to be his puppet, basically. He pulls the strings behind the scenes while she appears in court. Karlsson agrees before she learns Crazy Lawyer was disbarred because he was convicted of rape.

Berthaud goes out to dinner with the translator. I guess she got tired of waiting for Clement. I still think there's something up with the translator, like maybe he knows more about the deaf keyring case than he's letting on. Perhaps he's even a part of it.

Finally we get back to the dead baby case. The nanny is brought in to testify to Roban. She claims the baby was full of "evil" and she was just trying to get it out. With a knife. The nanny has already been psychologically evaluated but the judge wants her to be reassessed. 

Berthaud is meeting with, and flirting with, Prosecutor Clement when she gets a call from Judge Roban asking her to investigate Benoit. Clement overhears this and becomes concerned.

One of the deaf gang is released so that he can be followed. Berthaud and the translator are in a car watching as Fagin drives up in a van and forces the deaf guy inside. Berthaud knows the kid is going to be beaten. While they wait for the inevitable, she tries to get the translator to talk to her. The translator confesses he's engaged to be married. Whoa, guess they had more than dinner that night! Berthaud says it's no big deal, they just has sex. No reason to tell the fiancee anything. 

Why so slutty, Berthaud?

Clement goes to visit his father-in-law. FIL's business manufactures medicine and with the help of Benoit he is able to sell his product out the backdoor to other countries.

Crazy Lawyer Rapist advises Karlsson to get in on Elina's case. This is one of those cases that will blow up and get everybody's name in the papers. 

Elina's parents have come to Paris to identify her body. I warned you not to get gross, Show! There's no need to show me Elina's pulpy face again. As the stricken parents are leaving the morgue, Karlsson ambulance-chases her way into becoming their lawyer. 

Androux is upset to learn the nanny won't be criminally tried since she's found to be insane.

Benoit, still anxious to get his hands on the diary, blackmails his friend Clement. So let this be a lesson to you all. Beware a "friend" who offers you a sweet apartment in Paris. To protect his family, Pierre agrees. He waits until Roban leaves the building to sneak into the judge's very messy office. Clement doesn't know what the diary looks like so he has to search slowly. Slowly enough so that Roban, who remembered he left something behind, comes back to his office and catches Clement in the act.

What the hell did the deaf keyring kids have to do with anything? Why was the murdered baby even included in this episode? They barely touched that storyline. This show goes everywhere but where I want it to go. 

The King's Dream Episode 12

Chunchu runs - well, leaps to the defense of Munhui, who is entering medium rare territory up there tied to the stake. He cuts her bonds and carries her out of the flames. In order to save her life, Chunchu publicly declares he is the father of her baby. Outraged Grandfather/Prime Minister orders Chunchu to take his own life in order to restore their family honor. Chunchu agrees and is about to reach for a sword when Munhui beats him to it. She starts to stab herself with the sword when her brother Yushin (the one who was going to burn her in the first place) stops her. Grandpa isn't satisfied and orders his people to kill Chunchu. Yushin steps in to protect his friend. Ultimately it is Princess Deokman who orders everyone to hold up and leaves these two alone.

Well, that was quite a bit for just the first five minutes.

King Jinpyeong is fine with just letting this whole matter go. Queen Seungman continues to argue that Munhui must be made an example of for future royal concubines. The king shocks her by proclaiming he won't have any more concubine. Furthermore, he's going to name a crown prince. He won't name the name until after the rain ritual. Seungman looks like she's ready to lay an egg.

It's time to face the music. Chunchu plans to resign from his position, but not until he's found out who tried to kill Boro. Chunchu's mother is adamant that he not take Munhui as a wife. He goes to face his first wife, Bora, and try to work things out with her. She's not up for it right now. Can you blame her?

King Jinpyeong does a sort of dance. I guess this is the rain ritual he was talking about. His old man jig seems to do the trick as the rains begin to fall. However, in the middle of the celebrations, the king collapses. He's taken back to the palace to be examined. Jinpyeong is still alive yet appears to be in a catatonic state. The doctor believes the king has been poisoned. 

Remember that random non-white guy from last episode? A translator has been found and Chunchu learns it was the queen who hired the assassins. Since the king is out of it, Seungman is acting as regent. Chunchu goes to report to her and her continually off the wall hair arrangements. He only tells her that he believes he's close to finding out who was behind the attack on the boy. Seungman curls her nose (something she does all the time) and orders him removed from the case.

Chunchu's mother comes to tell him his wife has packed her bags and is leaving the city. Chunchu rides after Bora and stops her at the gate. Bora asks for some time apart so she can get her head cleared. 

The doctor now does a 180 and tells Deokman and Alcheon that the king wasn't poisoned. Still, he doesn't know why Jinpyeong won't come to. 

Seungman begins having the royal concubines tortured in a show of trying to find who poisoned the king. Deokman tries to talk some sense into the queen. Later that evening as she's alone in her quarters, Seungman has a visit from Bihyeong. He gives her a dead hamster. She offers to share power with him. Bihyeong warns her not to make an enemy of him and the Gwimun.

Bihyeong is crossing a bridge when - what else? Ninjas! Where do they get all these ninjas? Do they call up Acme Co. and order them by the dozens? For once Bihyeong realizes he's outnumbered and so leaps over the side of the bridge to the very shallow creek below. Now he runs into Myorang. She's hear to avenge the death of Gildal. As they fight, Bihyeong's reflexes begin to slow and his vision blurs. He realizes Seungman must have drugged him during his visit. This can't be the end of Bihyeong! He never got anywhere with Bohui.

Yushin is out in his courtyard doing some Tai Chi moves when a wounded and drugged Bihyeong drops over the wall. Bohui walks by and sees Yushin supporting a bleeding man. She recognizes Bihyeong from the alley fight and offers to nurse him. Be careful, Bohui. Remember what happened to your sister and a man who wasn't in his right mind. Don't let history repeat itself.

Yushin goes to fetch Nanseung and Chabi who then take Bihyeong back to Gwimun headquarters. Thus Bohui's virginity is safe for now.

The Prime Minister and the knights of the round table meet and agree to formally make Seungman the ruler of Silla. Princess Deokman is caring for crybaby Boro (who still can't act) when the queen's men enter the rooms with orders to arrest the boy. Deokman tries to protect her half-brother but she and her women are no match for the soldiers. 

Deokman goes to challenge the queen. (We also learn all the concubines have been flushed out of the palace.) The two women throw titles at each other. Seungman curls her nose and puts the princess under house arrest. Deokman is still able to meet with Chunchu and Yushin over an algae-laden moat. Chunchu tells the princess about Seungman being the person behind the attack on Boro and his mother. They have a witness but they still need solid proof. 

Seungman sends her guard dog and his men to strip Chunchu of his powers and to shut down his office. During the melee they discover the random non-white guy has been murdered to shut him up. Found near him - a dead hamster. (What Chunchu doesn't know is it was one of his men who killed the witness.)

Chunchu bursts into the royal courtroom to confront the queen and her twenty pound wig. He orders her to step down from the throne as she's not worthy. Seungman curls her nose.

Three Kingdoms Episode 38

This episode is known as The Night of No Sleep.

After calming down, Sun Quan agrees to listen to Zhuge Liang's plans for dealing with Cao Cao. Big Fan assures Sun Quan that even though Cao Cao has a million men in his army, they aren't all up to snuff for various reasons. At most Cao Cao would have a mere 100,000 soldiers who are combat ready. A number that could easily be crushed by the combined forces of Sun Quan and Liu Bei. 

That evening Zhang Zhao tries to talk Sun Quan out of an alliance. He points out this is a fight between Cao Cao and Liu Bei, and the Southland should just stay out of it. Zhang then goes to have a late night meeting with Zhou Yu to try and win the commander to the Dove side. Zhou Yu just barely sees them off from his house when the Hawk delegation arrives to try and persuade him to join their side. Will Zhou Yu not get any sleep tonight?

Apparently not, as just after the Hawks leave, more people arrive for a visit. And then more people! Is this whole episode going to be nothing but visitors dropping by Zhou Yu's house in the middle of the night? But finally the people he does want to see, Zhuge Liang and Lu Su, make their appearance. 

Zhou Yu tells his visitors he's going to advise his lord to surrender. Zhuge Liang stops playing with his fan long enough to use some reverse psychology. Of course it makes sense for the Southland to surrender as Zhou Yu knows he's no match for Cao Cao on the battlefield. All the Southland needs to do to secure peace is to send Cao Cao the two legendary beauties, Da Qiao and Xiao Qiao. What? Xiao Qiao is Zhou Yu's wife? Oh, I had no idea! Please forgive me for angering you into a warlike state. 

(Oh Zhou Yu, you are such an easily manipulated man.)

The next morning everyone stands around anxious to learn what Zhou Yu will tell Sun Quan to do. Zhou Yu gives a rousing war speech. To arms! To arms!

Ah, but when you have an alliance there's always the question of just who will be the power in charge. Zhou Yu, not trusting Zhuge Liang, mentions he may have to kill Big Fan. Lu Su begs for the other man's life. Alright then, Zhou Yu gives Lu Su the mighty task to find some way to basically get Zhuge Liang to switch sides and swear his fealty to the Southland.

A Hundred Year's Inheritance (Abridged) Episode 14

Now that she's footloose and fancy free, Chae Won returns to the noodle house. With one suitcase. (You can NOT tell me after three years, marriage or not, she's only got enough stuff to fit into one suitcase. There'd better be a delivery truck showing up sometime down the road.) The whole family is home so Chae Won breaks the news to them about her divorce. There are mixed reactions all around but at least dear old Dad welcomes her back with open arms. Love ya, Dad!

Chul Goo is drunk, but that's nothing new. EMIL is fussing at him as she helps him to bed. Chul Goo has enough sense left over, though, to notice his speechless mother is suddenly able to talk again. EMIL declares it's a miracle! Now it's time to move on to his next wife. EMIL doesn't waste any time.

Chul Goo has a drunk flashback to when Chae Won and he first met. I'm glad we're finally getting to this. As horrible as he's been, there must have been some reason for Chae Won to have married him in the first place. They met and flirted in an elevator when she came to interview for a job. I have to admit, Chul Goo was completely different back in the day.

EMIL celebrates her son's divorce with a bubble bath. Ah, my eyes!! (Still, I would kill to have her bathtub. Just not with her in it.) She's drawing up plans of what her next daughter-in-law is going to be like. 

Chae Won shares a bedroom with her aunt. Now that these two actresses are together, they appear to be the same age. Maybe Auntie was a late life baby. As Chae Won begins to unpack, she notices her knock-off Hello Kitty keyring and thinks of Se Yoon (in his odd coat).

Se Yoon (in his odd coat) and Joo Ri have apparently had a breakdown on the side of the road. As they're waiting for the tow truck to come pick them up, Joo Ri tries the old, "It's so cold, let's share body heat" trick. Se Yoon gives her his odd coat to snuggle with instead of himself. Seeing how put out Joo Ri over this, Se Yoon (very stiffly) gives in and puts his arm around her. Joo Ri continues not to see the red flags flying everywhere that the rest of us can see.

Grandpa expresses his hope to Chae Won that she will want to take over the family noodle business. At another time Grandma suggests they sell some land and give the money to Chae Won. None of this sits well with the other members of the family who are competing against each other to get the whole shebang. 

Business causes Chul Goo and Se Yoon to run into each other again. When Se Yoon mentions something about the other guy emigrating. Chul Goo loses his cool and accuses Se Yoon of meeting with Chae Won and influencing her into getting a divorce. Se Yoon, per his modus operendi, takes it all rather calmly and mildly warns Chul Goo not to act like such a fool if they ever meet again. Would it kill you to throw a punch, Se Yoon?

Chae Won is outside touching the noodles with her bare and unsanitized hands when she's summoned inside to meet with her aunts and uncles. They want to know just where she stands when it comes to the noodle inheritance. Is she in the competition or not? Chae Won assures her greedy family members that she's not interested at all in the noodle race and is instead actively looking for work.

Chul Goo receives a visit from the wife of the man who was injured in the warehouse fire. Through the things she says, Chul Goo finally realizes it was his mother who was behind that particular escapade. He's so upset that when he storms through the door, the entire wall wobbles.

Chae Won prays to the Almighty Hello Kitty/Not Hello Kitty to help her find a job. That night a repentant Chul Goo comes to the noodle house to try and win his wife back. Her entire family is ready to come to her defense. Once more he's down on his knees. How many times does this make? At least he does tell the family that it was his mother who framed Dad for the fire in order to force Chae Won to divorce Chul Goo. Grandpa collapses from the shock. Chul Goo proclaims he'll now fight the divorce as he never really wanted it in the first place. Dad collapses from the shock. Uncle Ki Choon, the only man left standing on his feet at this point, has had enough of this and physically tosses Chul Goo out of the house.

When next we see Chae Won, she's got a new job and a new hairstyle. The job is only temporary so she continues to pray to the Almighty Hello Kitty/Not Hello Kitty for something full time. She appears to be working in a department store. As Chae Won is coming back from her break, she's spotted by - you guessed it - Se Yoon. 

Again we get another weak cliffhanger. Show, you continue to drop the ball.

Darna Episode 25

The story so far: Serpina escaped Cobra Commander's cave. Carding found the sickly girl in the woods and took her back to the orphanage. Valentina tries to cure Serpina and gets totally freaked out by the girl. Mad Scientist Dr. Morgan puts a shock collar on Hawk Woman so Shiro can control her. Eduardo is starting to exhibit unusual strength. Turns out that sour puss Miss Perfecta was briefly married to Armida's ex-boyfriend. You know, the one Hawk Woman picked up and dropped on his head on his wedding day. 

Shiro continues to torture/train Hawk Woman. She learns her brother is still alive.

Valentina returns to the orphanage claiming she just wants to check up on how Serpina is doing. The young girl is silent and won't talk to anyone yet Valentina can read her mind. When she grabs Serpina's arm, the connection allows Valentina to see the memory of when Serpina found that pod thingy with Valentina's mother inside. Valentina goes to dig up her mother's grave and indeed she finds it empty.

Hawk Woman is able to escape her captors. She'll come back for them later, but right now she wants vengeance against Father Mateo. He's been feeling guilty that because of him innocent people were harmed by Hawk Woman's wrath, therefore he announces to his parishioners he's going to resign from the church and go hide somewhere far away. But it's too little too late as right then Hawk Woman appears.

Father Mateo begs for forgiveness but Hawk Woman ain't handing it out. Miss Perfecta angrily confronts Armida for killing her husband. Hawk Woman simply picks them both up and flies away with the elderly couple. Narda is in the congregation and is finally able to slip away and become Darna.

High up in the fake sky, Hawk Woman teases Darna to make a choice as to who she'll save, then drops both of them. At least Father Mateo is quick enough to grab onto Hawk Woman's leg. Darna swoops in and is able to catch Miss Perfecta before she goes splat. Father Mateo begs his sister to stop committing sins. She reminds him of how he once dropped her and she goes flying even higher, Mateo clinging to her ankle for dear life.

A filthy Valentina, searching for her mother, returns to Snake Cave and finds the pod that contains Consuela's body. She tries to revive her mother but to no avail. Fearing she'll be caught by Cobra, Valentina leaves and tries to come up with a plan to free her mother. 

After handing an unconscious Perfecta off to Gabriel, Darna flies back up to confront Hawk Woman. What is that in her hands. Is that a manhole cover? Yes, I believe it is. Darna flings the manhole cover at Hawk Woman, injurying her. Mateo is knocked loose and freefalls back to earth. Darna is able to grab him but he's far from thankful for her interfering. He actually wanted to die and perhaps appease his crazy sister.

Since she lost her brother, Hawk Woman moves on to Vengeance #2: Shiro. Alicia (wearing yet another hat) understands that Hawk Woman will be back and she urges Shiro and his gang to vacate their hideout immediately. As they're driving away, Hawk Woman lands in front of their car. Shiro uses a machine gun against her but Hawk Woman is fast enough to dodge all the bullets. Alicia, grabbing a gun from a dead and unimportant gang member, orders Shiro to get away while she keeps Hawk Woman busy. Hawk Woman smacks Alicia around a bit before Darna is able to once again show up with no explanation of how she knew where to be.

Shiro and his gang make it to an airport and get on a private plane. He doesn't seem all that concerned about going back to help his mother. Interestingly it is Liberty, Shiro's moll, who chooses to stay behind to try to find Alicia. I don't know why Shiro thinks he can get away in an airplane as Hawk Woman easily catches up to him. Hawk Woman pushes a button on her wrist control panel and... what the hell? Is that a missile launcher coming up on her shoulder? Dr. Morgan must have put it there when he did some modifications. Still, where does it fit on her bionic flight suit?

No! Must stop asking logical questions!

Hawk Woman launches a rocket at the airplane. The engine explodes in a ball of fire and the plane nosedives, crashing in the thick jungle. Hawk Woman and Darna have a staring contest up in the sky. Down at the crash sight something strange begins to happen. The ground shakes and green light bursts upwards to form a wormhole. Is this Tree Woman returning? Oh, I hope it's Tree Woman.

While Darna and Hawk Woman tussle up above, we see Shiro somehow has survived the fiery crash. Father Mateo worries that Darna may kill his sister. Hawk Woman shoots daggers at Darna. Darna is able to catch one and throw it back, hitting Hawk Woman in the chest. Armida plummets to the ocean and sinks down to Davey Jones' Locker. 

Darna goes to check on Shiro. He's dying and repentant, asking Darna to tell his mother he's sorry. Darna returns his body to his mother. Alicia blames Darna for not saving her son like she asked. Then Father Mateo shows up and yells at Darna for killing his sister. Everyone's turning against her. 

An upset Darna goes for counseling from Filipino Isis. She just basically tells Darna you can't please all of the people all of the time. Thanks alot, Filipino Isis. Darna notices she hasn't regained her power of speed, thus Hawk Woman must not be dead. 

The King's Dream Episode 11

Chunchu wakes up to discover his best buddy's sister is in his bed. Munhui, you have just taken advantage of an inebriated man who you know is married and is about to become a father. Congratulations - you are officially a Skank. Ah, and here comes big brother himself. Munhui quickly hides and Chunchu tells Yushin he's got to get to the office, bye! Yushin starts to leave when he just happens to notice a woman's earring on the floor.

As Munhui tries to sneak back to her quarters she is caught by Bohui, the non-skanky sister. Munhui makes up an excuse of where she was all last night. Bohui notices the other girl is missing an earring.

Princess Deokman asks both Chunchu and Yushin to train her half-brother, Boro. She still considers him to be the next in line to the throne. Naturally Queen Seungman hears about this and is not pleased. She gives orders to someone named Myorang to take care of this little problem. 

Next on Seungman's agenda is to meet with Bohui and Skankhui and choose who will be the new royal concubine. She puts the girls to a test. Several objects are brought out and the girls are told to pick what they think is important to a concubine. Bohui chooses a mirror while Munhui picks out a dagger. Seungman goes batshit crazy on Munhui, accusing her of thinking she'll replace Seungman as queen. Calm down, woman! Munhui manages to survive this encounter with a crazy woman, but something tells me there will be a next time.

As part of his training, Chunchu takes Boro to see a circus. Is that girl spinning on her chin? Cool. During the performance, Chunchu realizes he's been robbed. He orders the guards to keep an eye on Boro while he alone goes after the pickpocket. Chunchu gets a chicken thrown at him. Then he has a peasant thrown at him. When he finally takes the pickpocket down, the thief confesses to being paid to lure Chunchu away. The incompetent guards he left behind come running up to check on him, disobeying his orders to stay with the boy.

Boro is invited to be a part of a magic act. Ah, it's the old "Stick the boy in a wicker basket and make him disappear" trick. Boryang asks where her son is and a suspicious man, Mocheok, offers to lead her to him. The stupid woman follows. Chunchu has to ask Yushin and the Hwarang for help in finding the pair. Luckily they get a tip right away.

In a smokey forest, a tied up Boro and Boryang are told by Mocheok that it was Queen Seungman who ordered their fate. Myorang shows up and rightfully scolds the guy for telling the prisoners everything. Myorang is sharpening her tiny spear and getting ready to kill Boryang when Yushin and his multi-colored Hwarang show up. Myorang was expecting him and calls up her own reinforcements - forest ninjas. You know what this means. Time to twirl and leap and swordfight their ever-lovin' hearts out.

Yushin and Myorang face off in their own private twirling and leaping duel. While everyone is busy killing each other, Chunchu sneaks up and frees the prisoners. Myorang sees them escaping and goes after them. She's able to throw one of her little spears and hit Boryang in the back. With her dying (and bloody) breath, Boryang tells Chunchu to keep on going and keep Boro safe. 

Chunchu picks up the boy and starts running. As always happens in these Kdramas, the trail runs out and they end up trapped on the edge of a high cliff. Myorang throws another spear at them just as Chunchu jumps into the river below. Thank goodness Chunchu's eyeliner is waterproof.

They make it back to the palace although Boro is in critical condition. When he finally wakes up, Seungman and Deokman are at his bedside. Seeing the queen and knowing she's the one who ordered his death, Boro's eyes roll to the back of his head and he faints dead away. (I'm sorry but this child actor is simply horrible.) 

Chunchu tries to interrogate the magician who was part of the plot, but the guy is a foreigner and doesn't speak the language. A random non-white guy! Right in the middle of the things Chunchu is interrupted by a visit from Munhui. (They finally dyed her hair to match her wig. Good. Her two-toned hair annoyed me.) Chunchu doesn't remember anything from that night and begs to know if he did anything wrong. Munhui doesn't tell him about their wild and sloppy encounter. 

Just then his very pregnant wife, Bora, comes across them. A guilty Chunchu is about to confess to his wife but Munhui quickly covers for him. The married couple go inside. Suddenly Munhui feels nauseous, and not because she's upset. (Wow, that was quick. You are one fertile man, Chunchu.) And who should be watching all this from (not very) afar but Myorang, who quickly figures out there's something going on between Chunchu and Munhui. She reports back to Seungman. 

The decision is made that Munhui will be the new royal concubine. She is officially presented to Deokman and Seungman. Check out that wig on Seungman. Check it out! Munhui can hold back no longer. She blurts out she can't be a concubine because she's pregnant. Comical shocked faces all around. Seungman goes batshit crazy again.

Munhui's family demands to know who the father is but she keeps her lips sealed. Bohui tells her brother Yushin about how Munhui didn't come home that one night and was missing an earring. Perhaps she gave it to her lover. This reminds Yushin of the earring he found in the room where Chunchu was sleeping it off. 

Yushin confronts his sister with his findings. Munhui begs him to not reveal Chunchu's part in this scandal. She's willing to die in order to protect his reputation. 

Bora is gossiping with her husband which is how Chunchu learns about Munhui's pregnancy and impending doom. 

Yushin has Munhui tied to a stake on top of a woodpile and set on fire. Burn the witch! Burn the witch! Princess Deokman shows up and orders this travesty to be stopped but Yushin won't obey her. Then Chunchu arrives. He screams no and runs toward the burning Munhui. The camera starts spinning around. Hadn't seen that move in awhile. Didn't miss it.

A Hundred Year's Inheritance (Abridged) Episode 13

Chae Won officially surrenders in order to save her father. EMIL, after first taking out the battery from Chae Won's phone (just in case), finally speaks. She'll save Chae Won's dad but this time instead of Chae Won asking for the divorce, EMIL wants her to make Chul Goo so miserable that he's the one who wants to break up.

Se Yoon is having a snack with his family when he gets the call about Chae Won's dad being freed. Se Yoon's dad wonders if the guy Choon Hee was so worried about is someone she might marry. After what happened last time...   Se Yoon starts to ask "What do you mean, 'what happened last time'" but Clingy Mother cuts the conversation off. The adults decide it isn't a story their (adult) child should hear.

Chae Won returns home to find her husband is wearing some hideous pants. Are those the "meggings" I've been hearing about? She immediately starts picking a fight with her husband per her secret agreement with EMIL. Looks like its working. That Chul Goo is so easy to manipulate.

Chul Goo goes back to his favorite pastime: drinking. Chae Won tells him she already had the divorce papers filled out, all he has to do is sign them and have the papers filed at court. Chul Goo agrees that night, but in the morning when he's sobered up he changes his mind yet again and won't sign. Chae Won has to pick another fight just to get him in the right frame of mind to do her/EMIL's bidding. 

Chae Won and Chul Goo walk down the steps outside the courthouse. Finally it is a done deal! Good riddance to bad rubbish. Hopefully the story will move on now.

Se Yoon is...  what the hell is he wearing?! Who is in charge of the costumes on this show? They need to be tarred and feathered and run out on a rail. Anyway, Se Yoon is about to go out somewhere with Joo Ri when he gets a call from Chae Won. He immediately drops Joo Ri to run and meet the other woman at a nearby cafe. Chae Won is returning a handkerchief to him she had gotten snot and tears all over. She also thanks him for helping out with her dad. He's still under the impression she and her husband are emigrating soon. Chae Won doesn't do anything to correct his mistake or tell him she just got divorced. As a parting gift they buy each other Hello Kitty key rings.

Chae Won returns to her room to pack her one and only suitcase. Guess she didn't accrue much of anything for the past three years. EMIL comes in and tries to give Chae Won some money for her troubles (aka marriage) but Chae Won refuses. Instead she once again (weakly) swears she'll have her vengeance.

Zero Hour Episode 1

If Dan Brown's long-lost evil Siamese twin brother wrote a TV script...

Germany, 1938. A Catholic priest urges a group of men to hurry up with their clock making. Another man comes in to warn the priest that the Nazis have made a break-through, thus fulfilling the Biblical prophecies of the End Times. The mystery man sneaks the priest into a secret Nazi experimental hospital. They go to a room where a young baby, supposedly not born the old fashioned way, is sleeping. The baby opens its eyes and Ah!, it has no irises! Mystery Man and Priest are discovered and must make a run for it. 

Mystery Man and Priest meet with their fellow Rosicrucians. They must preserve "that thing" which is hidden below the cathedral. They bring up "that thing" (which is a big ass thing) to hide it away somewhere else before it falls into the hands of the Nazis or its the end of the world, yadda, yadda, yadda. You know the drill. Oh, turns out a Nazi officer is also a Rosicrucian and has come to warn them the enemy is right behind him.

Just as they get "that thing" loaded onto a truck, the Stormtroopers arrive. The truck gets away but the rest of the Rosicrucians (including Priest and Mystery Man) are shot to death.

Brooklyn, present day. Our hero, Hank Galliston, and his loving wife Laila are hitting the rummage sales down along the riverside. Hank has to leave and go back to his office at Modern Skeptic Magazine. (Yeah, I bet that's a big seller.) Laila spots an intriguing clock on one of the tables. 

Hank has a staff of young and attractive magazine writers. I'm a skeptic already. He receives a phone call from his wife who runs a store that repairs old time pieces. (Yeah, I bet that's a big money maker.) She's hiding in her office as someone is breaking stuff out in the shop. Laila begs her husband to call the police. (Why didn't you call the police, Laila?) By the time Hank rushes over to her shop, Laila has disappeared.

Hank returns home to find his staff of young and attractive writers are there to comfort him. Since he doesn't think the police are going to do much good, it's up to Hank and the Attractions to solve this mystery. Just as he notices the intriguing square clock sitting on the counter, the FBI stop by to ask some questions. Agent Rebecca Riley shows Hank a security camera video of the man who forced Laila into the trunk of his car. Out in the open, in broad daylight. Nobody saw this?

The man is known as "White Vincent", a well-known international mercenary. Offended that the FBI are suspicious of Laila's possible connection to a terrorist, Hank quickly shuffles them out the door. Time to get to work on that clock he noticed earlier. He figures his wife must have bought it at the flea market after he left her. 

Hank opens the clock's innards up and discovers a diamond inside. As he uses a flashlight to look closer at the flawed diamond, a map is flashed up against the wall. They take a picture of the map and go to consult with a priest at the New York Institute of Theological Studies. (Its only logical. Who else would you go to about a map on a diamond but a priest?) The priest determines the language on the map is one that hasn't been used since the second century and that the map was created by the Rosicrucians. (I have to quarrel here. The priest has to briefly explain to Hank and the Attractions who the Rosicrucians are. Everybody knows who Rosicrucians are, and someone working at something called Modern Skeptic Magazine should definitely already know who the Rosicrucians are.)

Hank gets a call from White Vincent. He wants the clock or Laila dies. A meeting is arranged in a park at four o'clock. Hank is all ready to make the exchange. Luckily this priest is pretty smart and points out there's no way this international terrorist would allow either Laila or Hank to live since they can ID him. This Priest suggests they keep the diamond.

Hank and the Attractions (Who is running the magazine while they're all out running around?) tell Agent Riley about Vincent calling but say he was asking for cash. Riley is skeptical (ha) that Vincent wants a ransom when he already has lots of money. 

With the FBI keeping tabs on him, Hank goes to the rendezvous point. He gets a call from Vincent directing him to go somewhere else. The FBI think they've got a trace on where Vincent is calling from and go to invade the building. Meanwhile, Vincent calls again and tells Hank to go to a nearby coffee shop. The two men are still on the phone with each other when Hank stops to tie his shoe, yet Vincent tells him to keep on walking like he is. Hank realizes the mercenary can't see him. 

The FBI bursts into an empty office only to find a video camera set up to view the park below. Vincent is watching the camera on his iPad while he sits outside the Institute where the priest with the diamond is. It gets even worse. We learn the priest's name is Mickle. Mickle? What kind of name is that?

Realizing what's going on, Hank rushes to the Institute to find a bloody Mickle on the floor. The diamond is gone.

The Attractions (who have no life but to follow Hank around everywhere) convince their boss to go back and study the pictures of the map. Something referred to as "New Bartholomew" on the map is the key here. If they can find Bart, perhaps they'll find Vincent and Laila. Hank goes to arrange travel to the North Pole where New Bartholomew is said to be located. He orders the Attractions to stay in Brooklyn and find out who made the clock in the first place and why.

At the airport Hank learns Agent Riley will be on the flight with him, following his every move. Back at the office, the Attractions have discovered the clockmaker's name inscribed inside and he happens to still be alive and in Bavaria. Good thing the magazine makes enough money to pay for all these airplane tickets.

Meanwhile, at Iqaluit, Nunavut, Vincent is scratching on a mirror. Hit the mute! Hit the mute! Oh, but then he takes off his colored contacts to reveal - he has no irises! Is he the baby from the beginning? 

Hank and Riley hire a local plane to fly them up to the North Pole. They land on the ice and Hank spies something partly buried up ahead. It's a Nazi submarine and its in pretty good shape. Inside they find the frozen bodies of the crew. They're in pretty good shape as well, what with being frozen for nearly 75 years.

The Attractions have flown to Bavaria and tracked down the clockmaker. Good thing he speaks fluent English and is willing to spill his guts. He explains New Bartholomew isn't a city but a person. In 1938, with the future of the world in doubt, the Rosicrucians decided to create 12 new apostles. Each new apostle got a clock. Our Bavarian clockmaker made the clock for the New Bartholomew who turns out to be... 

the Rosicrucian Nazi officer from the beginning...

who is found frozen on the Nazi submarine...

and he looks just like Hank.

Just then Vincent drives up to the submarine. Did you know you could just simply drive up to the North Pole? According to this you can.

Spiral Episode 1

The bloody nude body of a young white woman is discovered at the dump. Her face has been smashed in and her nipples cut off. Eww. The police are on the scene collecting evidence. Captain Laure Berthaud fills in the new prosecutor on what little they know about the unidentified victim. 

After the opening credits, we see the new prosecutor dealing with some outraged parents whose daughter claims her teacher, Mrs. Sauvanet, dressed up as a witch and hit the girl with a broom. The parents have gotten a petition together to try and get Sauvanet replaced. And this has what to do with what?

Down at the morgue the M.E., Marquant, is trying to carefully remove a bag that was placed over the dead woman's head. (Is this going to be gross? Do I need to look away?) Ah, it is gross! Even Capt. Berthaud has to look away. For the second time it is mentioned the dead woman must have been beautiful, hence the ferocity of the attack towards her face. However Marquant says the wounds to her face were done after she was dead.

More gross stuff goes on. The X-Rays show the woman once had a broken leg that was put back together with a plate and screws. The M.E. hopes to use this as a means of identifying the woman. Why we have to see him actually remove it, I don't know. Anyway, there is Cyrillic writing on the plate so they're working on the theory the woman is from a former Communist country.

Berthaud's lieutenant has to leave the room before he passes out. I can't blame him but Berthaud does, fussing at him that this isn't his first autopsy. 

Back to the prosecutor and some Law & Order: French Division. He's arguing a case in court against a couple who sound like a pair of gems. They tied some guy to a radiator and slashed him with a carpet knife. When the couples' lawyer stands up to begin his defense, Mr. Escudie suddenly clutches his chest and falls to the floor dead. You'd think this would be enough to stop the proceedings, but Escudie's partner, Miss Karlsson, takes over the case and is confident she can get an acquittal. No one seems to mourn the passing of Mr. Escudie.

Back to the dead girl that they now believe was an Eastern European prostitute. The prosecutor (if he has a name I still haven't caught it) asks Berthaud if she got his message about the teacher case. If there is supposed to be an attraction between Berthaud and the prosecutor, I ain't feelin' it. Yeah he's a good looking guy, but when its not there, its not there.

We go to a rather small apartment where a man and a woman are discussing the murder of the girl. The man is a cop and the woman is a prostitute he's hoping to get more information from. Perhaps she knew the dead woman or has heard something out on The Street. The washed-up hooker offers him some coke, and I don't mean the kind you pour over ice cubes. 

Back to the courthouse where Karlsson has indeed won her case. Now here I can feel the attraction between her and Prosecutor With No Name. Unfortunately this means Prosecutor is free to get back to the teacher case. What has this got to do with anything? Mrs. Sauvanet claims she never dressed up as a witch but she does use a puppet witch in her classroom. Both the Prosecutor and I find Sauvanet a bit off her rocker from the things she says. 

Berthaud's team has learned a young Romanian woman, Sofia Andrescu, has been reported missing although she doesn't quite fit the profile of the dead woman. Berthaud notices one of her guys isn't acting quite right. That would be Coke Cop. 

A skinny guy is about to pick the lock to an apartment when he's scared off by the approach of the elevator. It's Berthaud and Coke Cop come to interview Sofia's sister, Elina, who was the person who reported Sofia missing. Elina doesn't answer the door but a passing neighbor is just chocked full of information about the woman, like how she reads Balzac, will have her PhD. in biology, and works for a pharmaceutical lab. Thank you for the info, nosey neighbor who knows everything. What would crime shows be without these neighbors?

Berthaud leaves Coke Cop to watch the apartment for when Elina comes back. Coke Cop is too busy cutting himself a line to notice Skinny Guy leaving the apartment building with a large bag. It's up to Nosey Neighbor to call Berthaud and alert her that Elina's apartment has just been ransacked. A quick check shows the girl's computer is missing. This was no regular burglary but a clean-up job.

We learn Prosecutor has split up with his wife of eight years and he's mainly been living in hotels. His friend Benoit urges him to get a new apartment. I don't know about the Prosecutor but I'll take the apartment they're looking at right now. Ah, I finally learn Prosecutor's first name is Pierre. Now what's his last name?

The cops determine the dead woman is really Elina, not her sister Sofia. Berthaud is suspicious Elina was living such a luxurious lifestyle for a student who just started working at the pharmaceutical lab. And where's Sofia? 

More boring stuff about the student/teacher case. Now it's beginning to look like the child's family are very suspicious.

Prosecutor Pierre is having lunch with Benoit and shows his friend the picture of Elina (before she had her face beaten in). Why Benoit, what's that strange look upon your face? Did you know the dead woman?

Karlsson gets a job offer to work with another lawyer who likes to play with sticks. Again, what has this got to do with anything?

Prosecutor Pierre calls in the complaining parents from the beginning of the episode. He's figured out the girl's older sister is the one beating her, not the slightly cracked teacher. The mother forged some of the signatures on her petition which could be a charge against her. He throws the parents out of his office. Mrs. Sauvanet is innocent but ends up having a nervous breakdown anyway. Is that the end of this storyline? Why was this even in here?

Berthaud gets a lead. A taxi driver comes forward to say he gave Elina a ride the night of her murder. She had left a large diary behind in the taxi. How convenient. The diary is filled with names and addresses of well known people.

Clement! Prosecutor Pierre Clement! Now was that so hard, Show?

Pierre learns one of the addresses in Elina's diary is for his friend Benoit who finally admits he did know Elina.

So dark. So dreary. It's like all the colors have been washed out. That's the only thing that's been washed. Everything - and everybody - seems to have a layer of grime. I'm not saying all French people are dirty, its just the way this program was filmed. It makes me want to grab some soap and water and scrub everything - and everyone - in sight.